Short People Problems

Clocking in at 5’2″, I’m generally regarded as a short person. I’m shorter than most people, so I have to look up when I’m talking to them (but I usually just end up talking to their chins) and I have trouble reading menus or watching plays over people’s heads. You know, the usual slew of short-people problems. (Not that tall people don’t have problems, too.)

In elementary school, whenever we had assemblies, the fifth graders would sit on chairs in the back and everyone else would sit in neat rows on the floor in front of them in descending order of grade with the kindergarteners in the front row. In theory, this is a good idea because older people are taller, right? So, hypothetically, if the older kids sit in the back, they’ll be able to see over everyone else’s heads because everyone else is younger. For me, at least, this didn’t really work out. After kindergarten, I was always seated behind taller, but younger, students, so I never got to see anything. (Another flaw in this plan: those freakishly tall kindergarteners that make me jealous of their height.)

Being short my entire life, I’d come to accept that this is the way it will be forever, no matter how much I hope and wish and stretch and dream.

Until I went to Bangladesh.

It turns out that Bangladeshi people just happen to generally be even shorter than me, and for the first time in my life, I got to experience being tall. I got to look over people’s heads, I got to look straight at (or down at) people when I was talking at them. I got a taste of being tall, all 5’2″ of me.

And I never wanted to go back (to being short). But I’m back in America, the land of tall people, and here we are again, short.

But this isn’t the shortest I’ve ever felt. When I lived in Kentucky, the general population seemed to be significantly taller than the general population of Michigan. When I walked through the hallways, I was stuck staring at people’s shoulder blades instead of the backs of their heads. I had trouble finding my classes because I couldn’t see anything except humans. Whenever I talked to sixth graders, they were always shocked that I was in the eighth grade. Every single one asked me twice to double check and when I assured them that, yes, I am, in fact, an eighth grader, they always responded with a “but you’re so short!” In Michigan, while I am on the shorter side of average, my grade is never questioned.

Warning: This following segment will feel contradictory to the rest of the post.

While I’ve always felt short, I’ve never felt extremely short. As I said, I’m on the shorter side of average.

Mare Barrow from Red Queen, as I recently learned, is a fellow 5’2″.

Mare Barrow, as it states over and over over the course of the four-book series, is extremely short. She barely makes it to the shoulders of most of her acquaintances.

Which begs the question, “How ridiculously tall is the general population of Red Queen?!” and “Was this entire series developed to make me feel bad about my height?”

18 thoughts on “Short People Problems

  1. I love being short while I’m with my spouse. I fit snugly to his side, and his arm can easily slip across my shoulders. It makes me feel protected and loved. But being unable to reach things in cupboards or on shelves is a royal pain. Thank goodness for my tall spouse.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. There are definitely benefits to being short, such as blending in, being able to fit into small spaces, having leg room in airplanes, not feeling cramped all the time, being less likely to bump into things (except I’m super clumsy), etc.
      But it’s also annoying to have to ask tall people to get things down from shelves for you or to get out the ol’ step stool.

      Like

  2. I understand completely the short problems, and have always been called a shortarse by well meaning friends. Yet my 16 year old boy is 6ft 3, and my 14 year old boy is 6ft 1! And their dad is not that tall. They look down to talk to me now and say’God mum you really are small aren’t you

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Oh my God. LOOOOL. Short people problems should be replaced with Bangladeshi girl problems. Why are we all short???????? My cousin is 5ft3 & she has to explain that she is really, really tall for a Bengali girl. I’m 5ft1 & sadly have stayed that way since year 6. 😭 I thought I was so tall & then went to secondary school and saw that I was actually pretty damn short. Don’t get me started on lectures at university, if you don’t sit at the front or right at the top, we’ll hardly be seeing anything.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Whenever I’m at family events or Bengali parties, everyone comments on how tall I am (because I am for a Bangladeshi girl), while I’m thinking in the back of my head “then why can’t I see over people’s shoulders at school?

      Liked by 1 person

    1. I felt kinda bad writing this post because Spinnette only comes up to my shoulders. But she’s in Europe (which I’m jealous about. She should’ve smuggled me in her suitcase), so hopefully, she won’t read it.
      My height is pretty average, but, in order to preserve comedic value, I only focused on times when I felt short or my height (or lack thereof) resulted in (minor) complication/annoyances. In ideal circumstances, Spinnette wouldn’t be in Europe (or I would be in Europe, too), and I would enlist in her help.

      Liked by 2 people

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