A Makeup Tutorial from Spinette

Dear nonexistent readers,

Due to the impending doom and sneaky approach of midterms, it seems as though the days have inexplicably shrunk.

Apologies to all who have been here long enough to have read this post before, but I will be reposting an old post by Spinette.

Hello! Today we will go over the basics of how to cover up your web blushes! Most people don’t have web blushes because they know how to apply makeup properly, and if you are a lousy bum like me and can’t put on this stuff, this should be very useful.

First, we get the foundation! I like to use a moderate layer of cupcake frosting, since it comes in all different colors and is very diverse. Put it on your face, making sure to cover up everything! If flies and frosting lovers surround you, you are doing very well. Soak up that attention!

The next thing we do is the blush. This is a very, very, very important part of applying cosmetic appliances. I enjoy using Arachnid’s red stick that she puts on her lips. She honestly has no concept of beauty, since red is used for blushes and she doesn’t even have any! In circles, put it on your cheeks. At this point, your red stick should be only a stub. Don’t hold back!

Now for the lipstick. With the little stub you have from the blush, use the last of it on your lips. It should be pink now since you rubbed it onto the frosting (or some other shade with a touch of red if you are a person of color) This, in turn, will give a natural look to your lips. Use the whole stub.

Last but not least, the eyeliner! I use a black fine-point Sharpie to do this. The fine point will allow for thin lines and thick lines too. Use it on your eyes and your eyebrows. Make your eyebrows thick and pointy, making sure the eyebrow doesn’t even look like an eyebrow!  It is very unnatural to have eyebrows since you could look like a certain fourth-wall-breaking slug.

Most people would stop here, but I go above and beyond and do my hair as well. I usually do a messy bun, using a bread bun to measure how high my hair poofs up. On special occasions, I put sugar in my hair, since it makes me look like Elsa and it tastes nice when I get nervous.

For fashion, I usually choose long, dramatic, blood-red capes; short, sunny, yellow tank tops; and Aladdin size pants. I look good in almost everything, except high heels. I still wear them though, as a weapon for defense, in case Arachnid gets mad at me for using up her red stick.

Yay! Now you can go out and look super duper pretty! People might point out your incredible fashion sense, laugh with you on the streets, or gaze at you with lovesick side glances.

Have fun with your new look!

 

My Foodies

Surely, some of you, nonexistent readers, know what a food baby is. For those who don’t know, they are the result of what happens when you eat way too much of your favorite food. But the thing people never talk about are the food dudes or food babes, or the food … whatever suits your cup of tea.

*Sips milk tea*

Speaking of that, one of my food love interests is tea. Not just normal tea, milk tea, preferably with the black caterpillars, with lots and lots of sugar. If it is correctly done, tea is my weakness (Arachnid you can forget this). Unknowingly, when I am in a social gathering of old people who drink tea, I repeatedly go to the counter and fix up a cup of tea. Usually, I use these percentages for my tea making, so for those of you who do not like tea, take note:

Hot milk: 20%

Tea bag: 10% (if it is Earl Grey do 20%)

Sugar/ Honey: 70% (no butts!)

Another favorite foodie (scandalous!) of mine is underwater mini prawns, otherwise known as shrimps. I especially enjoy them on skewers, freshly grilled from the local seafood restaurant. Recently though, I discovered that all shrimps were bread using a disgusting technique where the shrimps are raised in dirty, toxic water. Of course, I didn’t think twice about eating shrimp for my occasional eight hour bath.

Cheesecake is one of my sweetest food … whatever suits my tea, because who doesn’t love cheese + cake! (Except the lactose intolerants…you are missing out.) It is so creamy and sweet and wonderful. Sometimes I cut up the cheese cake into teeny pieces then chew, say about thirty-three times and try to savor the flavor as much as I can. Let’s just say cheesecake is hard to come by for a below average wage author such as myself with a carnivorous monster always there to eat my food.

404 NO ENDING FOUND

BYE.

 

A makeup tutorial from Spinette

Hello! Today we will go over the basics of how to cover up your web blushes! Most people don’t have web blushes because they know how to apply makeup properly, and if you are a lousy bum like me and can’t put on this stuff, this should be very useful.

First, we get the foundation! I like to use a moderate layer of cupcake frosting, since it comes in all different colors and is very diverse. Put it on your face, making sure to cover up everything! If flies and frosting lovers surround you, you are doing very well. Soak up that attention!

The next thing we do is the blush. This is a very very very important part of applying cosmetic appliances. I enjoy using Arachnid’s red stick that she puts on her lips. She honestly has no concept of beauty, since red is used for blushes and she doesn’t even have any! In circles, put it on your cheeks. At this point, your red stick should be only a stub. Don’t hold back!

Now for the lip stick. With the little stub you have from the blush use the last of it on your lips. It should be pink now, since you rubbed it onto the frosting (or some other shade with a touch of red if you are a person of color) This is turn will give a natural look to your lips. Use the whole stub.

Last but not least, the eyeliner! I use a black fine-point Sharpie to do this. The fine point will allow for thin lines and thick lines too. Use it on your eyes and your eyebrows. Make your eyebrows thick and pointy, making sure the eyebrow doesn’t even look like a eyebrow!  It it very unnatural to have eyebrows, since you could look like a certain fourth wall breaking slug.

Most people would stop here, but I go above and beyond and do my hair as well. I usually do messy bun, using a bread bun to measure how high my hair poofs up. On special occasions, I put sugar in my hair, since it makes me look like Elsa and it tastes nice when I get nervous.

For fashion, I usually choose long dramatic blood red capes, short sunny yellow tank tops, and Aladdin size pants. I look good in almost everything, except high heels. I still wear them though, as a weapon for defense, in case Arachnid gets mad at me for using up her red stick.

Yay! Now you can go out and look super duper pretty! People with point at you, laugh with you on the streets, or gaze at you with lovesick side glances.

Have fun with your new look!