Here’s a list of things that I often say (when it makes sense in the situation). You should say them too. It is lovely advice.
Never ask a question you do not know the answer to.
The only possible motive for asking a question is to find out what the other person knows. For example, the teacher asks Freddie what 2+2 is, but obviously, the teacher knows what 2+2 is, s/he just wants to know if Freddie knows that 2+2=3.99999999999999999999999999999999999996999999999.
One must always believe whatever one finds on the internet.
Well, you nonexistent guys believe everything I tell you, right?
One must never have any expectations at all so one will always be impressed with one’s accomplishments.
This guarantees that you will never be upset when you fail and you will be pleasantly surprised if you succeed.
The worse something tastes, the healthier it probably is.
For example, Fenugreek seeds.