Mellow Yellow Episode 12 1/2: Filler Part 2, The Attendant Special

Due to sympathies felt by the authors, it has been decided that the ATTENDANT will receive more minimal lines to abate her unquenching thirst for the spotlight. Albeit, we will only refer to her as “ATTENDANT” to preserve her anonymity so she is protected from crazed fans and, most importantly, her ego doesn’t grow larger than it already is.

ATTENDANT (to an invisible audience): Oh! I’m so emotional. This is too much… All I can say is….. THANK YOU!

With that, she bursts into song with her surprisingly glorious voice.

ATTENDANT: MASSACHUSETTS GURLS, WE’RE DENIABLE. DULL, OLD, MILD, LIKE ONIONS ON TOP.

KYR and JOHN are the only people still in the store. KYR bursts into applause. JOHN looks aghast at ATTENDANT’S horrible interpretation of the classic song. Although, he must admit, her voice is only second to his own.

MASTER, now a ghost (he has obtained the ability to morph between the two forms), floats through the door and steals a dress for BREAD. It is made of a mixture of bologna and salami, although why a dress like that was in a fancy dress shop and not a deli eludes all.

ATTENDANT: I thought I screamed at you to get out of here!

 

~~~END

Mellow Yellow Episode 12: Cake

Back from the store, TICK and TOCK are baking a cake since they got outlawed from The Store of All Your Specific Wedding Needs.They are in MASTER’S office.

TICK: I’ve never baked a cake before. Have you, Tock?

TOCK: Does it look like I’ve baked a cake before? Of course not, you dummy!

Tears well up in TICK’S eyes

TOCK: I’m sorry… I didn’t mean it. Can you forgive me?

TICK is snoring

TOCK puts a bread crust in her ear

TICK: IREJOWt h oeruu h o uOW4uyeo 5ry9hfa;du ypr948p yoSHOpwej riop  j0weu p

TOCK: WE NEED TO BAKE THIS CAKE!

TICK (in that weird time where you are tired and can’t decipher fantasy from reality): OOOOHOOh lets make a cooking show liek Maswter!

KYR: (Providing subtitles) Ooooh! Let’s make a cooking show like Master! (Turns on the camera)

TOCK: So, first, to make the perfect cake, we need two pounds of sulfur and three chickens!

TICK: AMEK SURE the Chicken isa FREEEEESh!

KYR is still providing subtitles

TOCK: We mix it together, making sure that the chickens stop clucking and that the batter is nice and smooth.

TICK: SSSSSMMMMOOOOOOOTTTTHHHHH! (plays with TOCK’S hair)

TOCK: Then we put it in the freezer for about 40 minutes.

TICK: (hums Jeopardy theme song, but then stops) Hey, can you be the comedic relief for a second I want to do this part!

TICK: Okay… if you say so, Daddy!

TICK is sleeping

The cake explodes within the fridge, creating an element similar to TICK’S hair

ZHAN (descending from the clouds): YES!

MANAGER OPPA: IT’S PERFECT! (Coming flying in with the snowy egret)

TICK and TOCK: OLD MAN! (runs toward MANAGER OPPA)

ZHAN has a look of jealousy on his face, but TOCK realizes this and comes back to him.

ZHAN (smiling): Mommy!

TOCK: (slaps him in the face) Only Tick and Bread Snadwhich can call me that! (slaps him again)

ZHAN (Suddenly normal like the piece of cement he usually is): Can I at least have the element?

TICK (sitting on top of MANAGER OPPA’S head, wearing his glasses): No. That’s saved for Manager Oppa!

ZHAN glares at his new rival.

JOHN imagines ZHAN’S glare intensified by a thousand.

~~~END

Mellow Yellow Episode 10: Tricky Relations

LENA: Wait a second…

Everyone looks at her attentively

LENA (To QUINN in horror): If you’re marrying Bread Snadwich… and Bread Snadwich is Dad’s ex-wife, which means she’s my stepmom… then you’re my soon-to-be stepdad!

JOHN laughs

LENA (in a whiny voice): But I’m older than you!

QUINN (grinning): That means I’m the boss of you, soon-to-be stepdaughter, and I order you go to the wedding wearing a very fancy dress. The fanciest, itchiest, heaviest dress I can find, in fact. You’ll only be second to my darling fiance.

JOHN laughs harder. Only ARA can keep a straight face.

LENA (grumbling): @#$!

 

~~~END

 

Mellow Yellow Episode 2: Misunderstood Bread Lover

In the living room, Quinn is writing a love poem, while Zhan is using Tick’s hair to make his invention

Quinn: Should I use swans or doves? (vigorously writing poem)

Zhan: None. I don’t think your lady likes birds.

Quinn: Ahh, yes that’s right!

Zhan discovers that Tick’s hair is not, in fact, silver but a completely new element! He tests out its conductivity by using the hair to make an electric circuit.

Ara (to Zhan): (Coming out of nowhere) Oooooh, can you charge my nunchucks?

Zhan: (Awfully confused) Aren’t you supposed to be dead?

Ara: Yes?

Quinn: Done! (slowly looks towards Ara, and breaths in) Hi!

Ara: Hello.

Quinn goes to the kitchen where Tick is singing a lullaby to her child and hides under the table.

Tick: Lullaby, sleep tight….zzzzzzzz (Sleeping)

Quinn: This is my chance! (Using his Shadow Act, he slowly steals the child)

Quinn: Wake up! I made something for you, my love! (Carefully he unfolds the poem, blushing.)

Tick: ZZZZzzzZZZz (snorts)

 

The poem:

Violets are Red,

Roses are Blue,

I’m not very good at poems

Neither is the author

I can’t think of anything

I guess….

Swans, doves

I’ll protect you from all the birds

Beware this is becoming a free verse

I like cooking

Sudden ending

 

Bread Snadwich: …

Quinn: I knew you would love it! (hugs Bread Snadwich)

Tock is standing in the doorway, her jaw dropping down to the floor

Tock: MY BABY! (Aggressively pulls the sandwich out of Quinn’s hand) WHAT ARE YOU DOING! SUFFOCATING MY CHILD?

Quinn: You don’t understand…it was just…

Tock: (Not letting him speak) OFFICER! OFFICER!

John: (Stomping down the door, barefooted) Don’t fear, John is here! (turns to Tock and says with a Bostonian accent) So, what is the problem here, ma’am?

Tock: This little juvenile delinquent is choking my kid here, sir!

John: I’ll have to discipline him, ma’am.

Tock waves goodbye to John as he takes Quinn away

Quinn: Do I have to go to the slammer, officer?

John: No, kid! You think I would be one to send you to jail? My relationship with the police is bad enough! It’s even worse than the one I have with Lena!

Ship slowly sinks in the distance

John: And I have an even better punishment for you!

Quinn: What?

John: You will have to babysit the Mary Sue while we are gone to the Chocolate Hot Springs in Unicornia.

Quinn: Ara’s older than me…

John: Exactly. (Uses disappearing Act)

Lena: (Coming from the living room) I am sorry. You had to suffer through his ungummed breath. (Puts hand on Quinn’s shoulder)

 

~~~~END

Mellow Yellow Episode 1: Geography

Tick and Tock are in a bedroom while Zhan is building something in the other room. The bedroom is the new one given to them, but they still like their old one better.

 

Tick: (Slurps gummy worms from a teacup) So what do you want to do?

Tock: (Revealed to be a stool for Tick, also eating gummy worms) I don’t know

Zhan: (Whistling as he gets a monkey wrench) Lalalalalalalala

Tick and Tock: (dropping gummy worms) OLD MAN!

Zhan gets brutally tackled by the girls

Tock: Hey! Guess what? I made a sweater just for you! (Holds up a silver sweater)

Zhan (annoyed, but somewhat impressed): How the blobfish did you get that much silver?

Tick: From my eyebrow hairs, of course! (Displays her lack of eyebrows)

Zhan takes Tick away and closes the door.

Tock: Did you have to leave me out! Ugh! (Bangs on the door, but suddenly gets a new idea.) I know what I can do!

With brute force, Tock headbutts into the door

Tock: AAAAHHH! My horns are stuck! (cries) WHY MUST THE WORLD BE SO CRUEL?!

 

~~~~~~~

 

After a couple of hours, Tock hears a sound on the other side of the door.

John: (opens the door violently, singing) California Gurls! We’re undeniable! Daisy dukes, swim trousers on top!  

Tock: Owww…

John: (screams like a screeching saber-toothed monkey) Waah! (instantly covers his mouth)

Tock gets up and runs out the open door, ready to scold her sister

John: Phew! If that was Len, I would’ve died back there!

Lena: (crawling out from under the bed) JOHNNY YOU COME BACK HERE RIGHT THIS INSTANT!

John sighs, knowing what is to come

Lena: I DIDN’T KNOW YOU LIKED THAT SONG TOO!

John and Lena: (singing terribly) CALIFORNIA GURLS! WE’RE UNDENIABLE! DAISY DUKES, SWIM TROUSERS ON TOP!

Tock walks in, dragging a sleeping Tick, who is being shaved by mad scientist Zhan

Zhan: (Stops the shaving) What’s California?

John: (thinking very hard) I honestly do not know.

*Awkward silence*

 

~~~~END