Picky Eaters

I am a picky eater. I admit it.

Who wouldn’t want to admit it? I’m being way more cautious with my food! By pushing broccoli off the side of my plate as well as sending everything else on that plate besides the cheesecake into the trash, I’m preventing myself from getting food poisoning. Just think about it— if you are in someone else’s house, especially someone you don’t know and see something questionable on your plate would you eat it? Would you eat that green-brown ewwy gooey slop?

I hope that is a no. (If you are one of the rare people who said yes, you must be a very dedicated mine digger!)

For picky eaters, most food is this ewwy gooey slop. Almost for all people, there is a gooey slop food, whether it be shrimp, to veggies, to chocolate. The only food I haven’t seen such a sloppy hatred for is mid -sugar level cereal, like Cheerios. (Let’s get real, everyone has a mini crush on that hot bee dude in the commercials, right? Just me?) Anyway, everyone has that type of food, unless you are a pig. That type of food for me is basically everything that is not healthy, such as veggies and some (a lot) fruits. I enjoy foods that are less of actual nutrients and more of these somethings called calories and sugar. How I don’t get diabetes astounds me.

Maybe, it’s just my digestive system. I’m like a plant— I get all my nutrients from the computer light. It sends me into the process of photosynthesis, but as I miraculously get nutrients, I digest all the junk in my body. This is how I prevented myself from the terrible fate of death.

Perhaps all people like me go through this process. Which means if that you don’t get diabetes and you eat nothing but sugar you are probably an advanced type of human species. And not a complete slob.

So if you are a cranky child who cannot eat Brussels Sprouts, show this to your parents. They’ll be convinced that you are actually a superhero, even if you don’t eat veggies! We are a superior race of human!

sretae ykcip ,dlrow eht revo ekat s’tel

 

Is Cereal a Soup?

I was asked the other day “Is cereal a soup?”

Well, my immediate answer was no because cereal is cereal and soup is soup and cereal is not soup; but I try to keep an open mind, so I considered the question again.

Reasons Cereal is Not Soup

• Cereal is cold
• • But cereal doesn’t necessarily have to be cold
  • Some soups are cold
• Cereal is a breakfast food and soup is not
• • No one is stopping you from having soup for breakfast and cereal for dinner
• Cereal is Cereal and soup is soup and cereal is not soup
• • What is soup?

What is Soup?

According to Dictionary.com, soup is a liquid food made by boiling or simmering meat, fish, or vegetables with various added ingredients.

Reasons Cereal is Not Soup: Updated Edition

• Cereal is crunchy, and therefore not entirely liquid
• Cereal is not boiled
• Cereal is not simmered
• Cereal does not contain meat, fish, or vegetables with various added ingredients

But what if you despised vegetables (like Spinette) and refused to eat any (like a five-year-old child) and you were also a vegetarian?

• Note: Vegetarians don’t have to like vegetables. They can eat other meat-less food items like processed foods. For example, granola bars, popsicles, ice cream, chocolate, fruit snacks, gummy bears, oatmeal, Jell-O, etc.

If you were five-year-old vegetarian Spinette, then you would like your chicken noodle soup without chicken or vegetables. It would just be noodle soup. But this noodle soup does not contain meat, fish, or vegetables (like the cereal) and therefore, it is not a soup (even though soup is in the name. This is a similar dilemma as the one surrounding baby powder. There are no actual babies in baby powder as there is no soup in noodle soup).

So then what is noodle soup if not soup?

Soggy pasta, perhaps?