I joined Twitter!

Greetings, multiple humans and single armadillo!

In the words of the great Pinocchio, I have become a real teenager. Three days ago, I acquired a Twitter account. (I mean, I still have to try coffee, so I’m not totally a teenager yet, but we’re getting there.) I even have one follower! (Thanks, Sophia Ismaa.)

So if you guys want more of my characteristic wit and charm in short, digestible tweets, hop on over to the Twitter @arachnid_weaver. Also because I’m lonely and I don’t want to feel like I’m writing into a void.

“Welcome to Tweeter”
[INSERT WITTY COMMENT HERE]
*Watch for likes. Feel self-esteem grow.*

— Arachnid Weaver (@arachnid_weaver) December 23, 2019

Now that I'm an official Tweeter, I feel like a cool, genuine teenager. 😎

— Arachnid Weaver (@arachnid_weaver) December 24, 2019

Bird is jealous of the tree topper pic.twitter.com/b5cnfv1XIJ

— Arachnid Weaver (@arachnid_weaver) December 25, 2019

*Proudly shows off my three tweets*

Print them out and hang them up, if you’d like!

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Photo by Tina Nord from Pexels

So I’ve Been Gone…

Sorry, I’ve been gone for a long time. A LOOOOOOOOONG time.

I was fingerless after the keyboard amoebas ate my hands. It was quite the predicament. The injury hurt so much that I couldn’t eat my favourite cereal with my hands soaking in milk anymore, I was unable to draw, unable blog, and did I mention, I couldn’t consume the tastiest, liquidy cereal barehanded any longer? It was insane, spiders!

I tried to find a solution. I went to all the palm readers, tattooists and mimes I could find, but they all stayed silent despite my troubles. It was my life’s quest to get my hands back. Then it hit me!

After a long time of thinking, and a long time of panicking, I decided to go find a unicorn slave.

But then I realized they had hooves. Not fingers.

Now, I have a fish typing for me. It’s much more efficient, since, you know, everyone knows that fish have eight typing tentacles which they crawl with.

Wait a minute…

My slave has informed me that she is my pet spider. I am sincerely sorry; I don’t live around too many species.

XglsiruwIRsor

She just angrily jumped on the keyboard, while claiming that I’ve been with her for about ten years or so.

Oh! She just told me this is a private matter and to not have me dictate any about anymore. “A blog should be a connection between the author and reader,” she says, “without a MIDDLE MAN.”

I don’t know what she’s talking about. Men with average heights are great! Women are too.

So readers, if you have painfully average height, it’s not as painful as my late onset shortness. (I had carpet amoebas the other day.)

And remember, dear blog scanners, stay away from amoebas!

 

Middlegame || Spectacular Sci-Fi

Meet Roger. Skilled with words, languages come easily to him. He instinctively understands how the world works through the power of story.

Meet Dodger, his twin. Numbers are her world, her obsession, her everything. All she understands, she does so through the power of math.

Roger and Dodger aren’t exactly human, though they don’t realise it. They aren’t exactly gods, either. Not entirely. Not yet.

Meet Reed, skilled in the alchemical arts like his progenitor before him. Reed created Dodger and her brother. He’s not their father. Not quite. But he has a plan: to raise the twins to the highest power, to ascend with them and claim their authority as his own.

Godhood is attainable. Pray it isn’t attained.

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I loved this book. So much. It’s a new favorite. It would be good for fans of Vicious by V.E. Schwab.

The writing is gorgeous, but it is heavy on metaphor and imagery. It’s a little hard to read, and I was rereading a lot of passages, trying to figure out what was going on. After a while, I got used to the writing and it went a lot smoother. I’m a little suspicious of the writing, though. I’m prone to drooling over beautiful writing and ignoring what is actually being said.

The plot is intricate and brilliant, but it’s confusing. The story jumps right in without much background information, so it was especially confusing in the beginning. It was also confusing at the end with the time travel. You could say that the plot is layered like an onion, but you could also say that it’s stingy with information. The reader and the characters spend much of the book in the dark.

Middlegame is a long book, and the pacing is slow, especially for the first half. However, I enjoyed the first half more than the faster-paced second half and it was very compelling. I couldn’t put it down.

The characters were lovely, and I especially adored Dodger. Usually, the characters are my favorite part of a book, but in Middlegame, the characters seemed less important than the plot. However, they did have wonderful arcs and I loved seeing them grow up. They were very relatable.

The atmosphere of Middlegame is amazing. It’s mysterious and by the end, it feels like the book has revealed the secrets of the universe.

Rating: 5/5

Writing in the Middle of the Night

The middle of the night is the perfect time to write. I lay buried under blankets, staring into the deep darkness, my eyes dry and unblinking, and I travel worlds in my mind. I can let go of my earthly obligations to be a functioning human bean and transcend the boundaries between this world and the one I’ve created. It’s when plots solidify and worlds unfold.

This intense thinking, of course, comes with detrimental effects to my sleep and therefore harms my daily functioning. I slog through the day on far less sleep than I should have since I stayed up late into the night daydreaming (also known as teleporting).

Despite doing much of my writing in the middle of the night, I think I’d prefer to be a daytime writer, but alas, my mind seems to be otherwise occupied during the day. I simply can’t stare off into the distance melodramatically for hours.

Aside from sleepiness, writing at night comes with many other drawbacks. As most of the writing happens in my head, I forget much of it the next day. Not only do I forget it, I forget about its existence, as well, so I don’t even attempt to retrieve the idea from the depths of my brain.

When I think of a lovely idea, I get up and write it on a sticky note, which I stick to my night table. This way, writing at night works like a filter — or my own laziness is the filter — because I can only be bothered to write down the good ideas and the bad ones are discarded and quickly forgotten. But it’s sad that the mediocre ideas, the ones that just need a little love and attention before they become adequate, are tossed too. (It should be noted that what I think are good ideas with my sleep-addled brain usually don’t seem so great in the morning.)

The sticky notes are becoming a problem. I usually leave them on the nightstand and transcribe them to my computer on the weekends. But sometimes, when I’m lazy, they just stick to my nightstand and collect dust. And the sticky notes quickly build up until they’re covering every inch of my nightstand, usually three or four sticky notes deep. At this point of the sticky note apocalypse, I move on to sticking them onto my bed frame. And the process repeats itself. It hasn’t gotten that bad yet, but I imagine if this trend were to continue, the walls near my bed would be next and then the sticky notes will slowly encroach on every part of my room, spreading like a fungus, until my room becomes a sticky note paradise. But don’t worry — I’m not the stereotypical potential serial killer yet.

Why Writing and Marriage Are Pretty Much the Same Thing

As someone who has never been married (and has conducted only minimal research), I can definitively conclude that writing is just like marriage.

Like marriage, stories start in the honeymoon phase: the idea. Your new idea outshines all your previous ideas combined. This is the best idea you’ve ever had, the best story you’ll ever write. You start planning excitedly, the opportunities infinite. The words and the characters and everything will work this time, you just feel it. The honeymoon phase is the glory of the initial idea, the sloppy love of the first draft, the adoration of words without the struggle. You immediately drop whatever you were working on last, in varying states of incompletion, and start working on your new story.

The inevitable fall happens when the illusion of the idea fails under your subpar abilities to capture your imagination. You see the story for what it really is: a dumpster fire. You read your first draft—which had seemed worthy of your favorite authors before—and cold dread makes its way through you. The plot holes, the awkward sentences, the grammar errors are circled in an imaginary red felt-tip pen, each glaring mistake a strike to your ego. The story did not go as you planned, and not in a good way. Was the idea too weak, or was it your writing abilities? Who’s to blame? This phase of the writing process is characterized by hopelessness. The story will never get better and you are a horrible writer. You don’t even deserve to try. The story gets locked away deep in a drawer where it will never see the light of day again. You move on to other loves. Maybe you’ll take up piano or art.

After a few weeks or months, after you’ve cleared your head, tried other things, you come back to the story and see it with fresh eyes. It isn’t quite as horrible as you remembered. It’s definitely not good; in fact, it’s still pretty terrible, but you think it could go somewhere with a lot of work. This phase is the most difficult as you systematically destroy and rebuild everything. You try to make the story at least vaguely presentable. You coax the words with cream and pretty ribbons to get them to work for you and align in a lovely way. It’s exhausting. It’s full of long nights critically analyzing every word, deleting huge swaths of text you’d spent hours writing the day before. For every step you take forward, it seems as though your taking a thousand back. Every patched plot hole introduces hundreds of cracks.

Eventually, your story becomes adequate, and you’re finally pleased with yourself. You’ve grown as a writer. You’ve created something better than anything you’ve ever written before, even if it’s not as good as you wanted it to be. It’s when you allow yourself to read the story for the first time as a reader instead of as a writer and you get to praise the lovely phrases, the characters, the plot, instead of looking for what’s broken. This is when the story is finally put away and it stops lingering in your mind every waking moment. The story is closed and filed away and you’re content, and you get to look forward to the next honeymoon phase with the next story.

It’d be lovely if that were the last phase, but for me, at least, it’s not. The stage of being happy with my story is uncomfortably short. It usually lasts a few days and then I’m back to hating the story. Which means that, yes, I say that I love writing, but I spend most of my time hating what I write. Maybe I should take up piano or art.

I’ve Returned!

Greetings, nonexistent peoples of the blogosphere! (I suppose you really are nonexistent now, after my little disappearing act.) I’ve returned from my unannounced, unplanned hiatus. You must’ve thought that I’d gone to the Alaskan wilderness to meet the narwhals, and I’m flattered that you thought I was such an adventurous person, but alas, it’s been far more mundane. I’ve actually been only two feet from my laptop and unable to blog because school. Blech.

It’s been a touch more insane than I expected. However, it’s summer now! Well, until Tuesday. I have to go to summer school, BUT I should still have more time, so I can blog again! Hopefully. *Confetti*

So this is where I tell you that I’ve decided that my course load was far too much this year, so I’ll take easier classes next year. And while that’s the sensible thing to do, I’ve decided to take three AP classes, which is three times more than I took this year, and I’m now on the board of the one club I’m a part of. Plus SATs. (Which is, like, nothing compared to what some people do. These magic humans do not sleep.) So, as I had no time to blog this year, I probably won’t next year, either.

So what’s my plan to keep the blog from crashing and burning again? Because I really don’t want to disappear again. I really missed you, nonexistent readers, and I missed writing, too. So, my plan: I’m going to cut back on the frequency of posts to one a week (I know, how sad) and I’m going to try and schedule an entire school year’s worth of posts this summer. Will this work out? Who knows. *Shrugs*

Tess of the Road || A Book Review

In the medieval kingdom of Goredd, women are expected to be ladies, men are their protectors, and dragons get to be whomever they want. Tess, stubbornly, is a troublemaker. You can’t make a scene at your sister’s wedding and break a relative’s nose with one punch (no matter how pompous he is) and not suffer the consequences. As her family plans to send her to a nunnery, Tess yanks on her boots and sets out on a journey across the Southlands, alone and pretending to be a boy.

Where Tess is headed is a mystery, even to her. So when she runs into an old friend, it’s a stroke of luck. This friend is a quigutl—a subspecies of dragon—who gives her both a purpose and protection on the road. But Tess is guarding a troubling secret. Her tumultuous past is a heavy burden to carry, and the memories she’s tried to forget threaten to expose her to the world in more ways than one.

Returning to the fascinating world she created in the award-winning and New York Times bestselling Seraphina, Rachel Hartman introduces readers to a new character and a new quest, pushing the boundaries of genre once again in this wholly original fantasy.

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• This book is ridiculously amazing.
• It’s not for everyone, though. It’s really slow, and there isn’t much of a plot. It’s mostly just a character arc. But it’s a heck of a character arc.
• For what little plot there was, I was confused for much of it.
• THE CHARACTERS. Tess is an amazing character. She’s so developed and she seems like a real person. She has faults (many of them) and dreams and shames and other person-y things. She feels real, and I love seeing how she changes over the course of her journey.
• The cover is a bit misleading. There aren’t really any dragons the way the cover implies. There’s a large, four-armed lizard and a really big snake, to say the least, but the dragons are in human form. It is fantasy, but it reads almost like historical fiction.
• I love that the heavier topics were thoroughly discussed.
• The book is really slow, but it’s compelling. You want to keep flipping the pages and keep reading and reading and reading (Warning: homework will suffer).
• This takes place in the same world as Seraphina, but it’s necessary to read it beforehand. However, it is nice to read it first so you get a grasp on the world. There are also a lot of character cameos and references to Seraphina.
• The writing, like in Seraphina, is gorgeous. I really love it.

Cleaning Out My Spam Box

If you suddenly found yourself in possession of a genie’s lamp and you had three wishes, what would you wish for? Would you wish for the chance to reply to all those spam comments you get? Me neither.

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The Liebster Award

music containing substantive, educational
messages to maximise their child. I suspect how the
clue to this particular thinking lay behind the tattoo right across
his forehead which simply read: “Mind the Gap”. Your other legitimate source on your NY Giants tickets could be the many licensed New
York ticket brokers, who walk out the way to arrange your tickets for you.

Maximizing a child sounds like a scary process. It’s like you’re viewing your child as a robot that needs to reach maximum efficiency. Also, the forehead is an interesting location for a tattoo. What does Mind the Gap mean? What gap?

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On Surviving a Social Gathering

I don’t even know how I ended up here, but I thought this post was great. I don’t know who you are but definitely you’re going to a famous blogger if you are not already   Cheers!

Thanks! Cheers to you, too.

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On My Sense of Smell

Wow that was unusual. I just wrote an very long comment but after I clicked submit my comment didn’t appear. Grrrr… well I’m not writing all that over again. Anyways, just wanted to say great blog!

Now I’m curious. What was the super long comment? Did it ever exist in the first place?

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On Harry Potter Book Tag

By following the following tips and asking
the contractors some quick questions you’ll be in the better position to select
a qualified cardpet installer. The installation service mightt be more expensive than doing it
yourself but worth every penny all in the long
run. Less Maikntenance – The madket comes with a wide variety of carpets that
are stain-resistant.

Unfortunately, I’m not in the market for new cardpet at the moment. Just had mine replaced a year ago. It’s very lovely. Plush and gray and cardpet-like. I’m happy with it. Maybe you’d find more interest in your cardpet installation service if you knew how to spell the name of your own business?

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On The Forgotten Blog Ideas

Eҳcellent bеat ! I would like to apprentice whilе you amend your web site, how could i ѕubscrіbe fⲟr a blog sitе?
The account aided me a accеptable ԁeal. I had bee a little bit
acquainted of this your broadcast offered bright clear idea

You think I could write songs from my blog posts? They’d all have excellent beats for sure. I’m flattered that’d you want to be my apprentice, but I’m unfortunately not accepting apprentices at the moment as I’m not amending my web site. To subscribe for a blog site, you click the subscribe button, I believe. I’m glad my account aided you acceptably, but I was hoping for spectacularly, so I’m a bit disappointed. You think I could make a radio show from my blog posts?

Where did you go?

Greetings, peoples of the blogosphere!

It’s been a rather long while, hasn’t it? But don’t worry about me; I haven’t spontaneously combusted or anything, in case you were wondering. Instead, I’ve been slowly drowning in an expansive ocean of homework, from which I couldn’t reach my laptop in order to ensure you that I was, in fact, alive. I did, however, possess an abundance of paper and various writing utensils, so I attempted to write you a letter notifying you that I remained in existence, as I’d hate to worry you. But you know the unreliability of leaving notes in bottles. *Shrugs*.

But while you need not worry about the state of my aliveness, I’m afraid you must fear for my humanity, as recently I’ve felt as though I’m simply a homework robot.

With the semester ending, school has gotten very intense, and unfortunately, when you never seem to have enough time, it’s the things you enjoy doing that must be cut out. I’m afraid that school will not be getting any mellower with midterms approaching, so expect sporadic, unpredictable, and unanticipatable blogging. (Apologies for using three adjectives in a row that mean the same thing. It usually annoys me, but I couldn’t help but highlight the delightful contradiction of expecting the unexpected. It makes me simply giddy.)

I’m planning to post once a week for a while. Probably until mid-January. Most likely on Mondays.

So, that’s it for this mishmash of a post summarizing the last 27 days without you peeps (A Summary of a Summary: homework.).

In conclusion, abrupt goodbyes.

The Nightmare of Dentistry

I went to the dentist today. I despise the dentist.

But I have no cavities! Aren’t you so EXCITED that I have no cavities?! *Jazz hands*

I dislike the dentist so much because of the way they put their fingers in your mouth. Yes, they wear gloves, but still.

It’s also really wet. Yes, that drool sliding down your chin is yours, but it’s still spit. And it belongs in your mouth. And what about that suspicious clear liquid on the dentist’s glove? Is it water, or is it SPIT? My spit, but STILL!

Even more than doctorism, dentistry is one job I could never do. Day in and day out, you’re just sticking your hands in people’s mouths. So applause to all the dentists of the world for risking their sanity in order to keep people’s mouths cavity, pain, and dirt-free. *Claps*

ALSO. If there are any dentist out there reading this, please educate me on the rules of dentist-appointment etiquette. What the heck are you supposed to do with your tongue?!

• Put it at the bottom of your mouth?
• The roof of your mouth?
• Follow the fingers/tools? This is what I tend to do. I try not to, but it’s not a conscious thing. Sometimes I remember not to, sometimes I don’t. But if I were the dentist and the patient were doing this…
  • Arachnid the Dentist (screams): AHHH! THE TONGUE IS ATTACKING ME!!! (Runs out of the office, leaving the patient strapped to the chair with multiple sharp objects in their mouth.)
• Curl it up at the back of your mouth?
• Lick the dentist’s tools?

When I’m at the dentist, I feel like a puppet. A very stressed puppet. Because here I am at the dentist’s mercy (I mean, if they wanted to, they could stab your mouth with those pointy tools) with sweat dripping down my back and the bright lights glaring at my eyes, masked dentists leaning above me with sharp tools at their disposal, thinking about all the other mouths these tools have touched (It’s the same principle as using a fork a restaurant), while the dentists are conversing with each other like normal human beings, occasionally asking you to tilt your head or open your mouth wider.

Arachnid Writes a Story

NARRATOR: Arachnid’s fingers dance over the keyboards as he weaves a story. Her fingers struggle to keep up as she records the symphony in her head.

ARACHNID slams her face into the keyboard after staring at a blank document for an embarrassing amount of time.

A lightbulb flashes into existence above her head as an idea comes to her. She furiously types.

She pummels the backspace bar, beating it bloody, then slams her face into the keyboard again. Random letters appear on the screen.

ARACHNID: Ugh! Why is this so hard?

LAPTOP: I’m sure it’s harder for me than it is for you. What with the beating my keys bloody and all that! (Glares)

ARACHNID: If only I chose to like something I was actually good at. Imagine how convenient it would be!

LAPTOP: And if you like something you were actually good at, you wouldn’t beat my keys bloody anymore! (Glares harder)

ARACHNID: Come on, Laptop, you’ve been with me through it all. Essays, stories, disgusting attempts at poetry… You must have some ideas!

LAPTOP (softening a bit): Well, you could try writing short, random pieces before you get back to the hard one. Just write whatever. Flex those writing muscles! Preferably without beating my keys bloody. Practice makes better, as a wise first-grade teacher once said.

ARACHNID: Whatever? As in anything I can think of? Like a scene where you give me writing advice?

LAPTOP: If you must. (Sighs)

ARACHNID: Aww. I love you, too.

Ask TheWebWeavers || How do I tell my parents I’m moving?

John Siebelink asks…

Dear Arachnid,

So, I’ve been planning to move out to California for almost two years now, but because I’m not too close with my parents I haven’t said a single thing to them about it. How do I bring it up that I’ve been planning it for so long without them accusing me of another rash decision I’ve been known to make in the past?

This was sent in early June. So I’m sure you’ve figured it out by now. But I’m going to answer the question anyway. Maybe it’ll help someone else in an eerily similar situation.

So. I think you have to convince your parents that this is not, in fact, a rash decision. Show them that you’ve learned from the past. You said in your letter that you’ve been planning for two years. So WE know that it’s not a rash decision. You’ve put so much effort into planning the move, it’s anything but. So how do you tell your parents that?

This is going to sound silly, but what if you made a PowerPoint with every last detail of your move planned out. Your job, where you’re going to live, a plan to get an apartment/buy a house, your movers, etc. This will probably be helpful for you as well, to figure out any last minute details.

If your plans are rock solid and well-thought out, your parents will know it’s not a rash decision.

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Do you have any questions that need answering? Send them to Ask TheWebWeavers using the Contact Page. Please specify if you want your letter to be anonymous. If you want the world to know who you are (otherwise known as this small corner of the internet), we’ll add a link to your blog to help spread the love.

World Mental Health Day: Pick Me Up Playlist Tag

Heyo, peeps!

Spinette and I both adore music. We talk mostly about music when we text. But we listen to vastly different genres of music. Spinette adores K-pop while I prefer alternative rock. I usually listen to pessimistic songs. (Hey, I’m a pessimistic person *shrugs*.) In fact, a common complaint of Spinette’s is that I listen to too many songs about death. However, I’ll try to stick to the more upbeat ones for this tag.

I’m so excited to share my music with you guys!

I was tagged by the ever wonderful Sophia Ismaa. Go check out her blog, peeps, you won’t be disappointed.

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RULES

1. Link back to ‘Pick Me Up Playlist’ creator – Laura Spoonie
2. Tag the blogger who nominated you
3. Mention how music helps your Mental Health
4. List 10 songs that you would consider to be a part of your ‘Pick Me Up Playlist’ (optional: mention a little bit why each song is on your list)
5. Tag 10 other bloggers to join in with the ‘Pick Me Up Playlist’ Challenge

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Music helps me relax while I do my homework. I am up to my eyeballs in homework. My eyeballs are sad.

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1. Unstoppable by The Score

The Score is one of my favorite bands and this is my favorite song by them. Listen to the lyrics. Very Pick Me Up. (I’m succeeding at following the rules of this tag!)

 

2. Better by OneRepublic

A very terrific song. It makes me happy.

I think I’ve lost my mind. Don’t worry about it. Happens all the time. In the morning I’ll be better.

Me too.

 

3. Happier by Bastille and Marshmello

This one’s a new song by the amazing Bastille (and Marshmello) that I love. It makes me happier. The video, ironically, is quite sad.

 

4. Blood by My Chemical Romance

The tune is very peppy.

 

5. The Middle by Jimmy Eat World

It just takes some time
Little girl, you’re in the middle of the ride
Everything, everything will be just fine
Everything, everything will be all right

 

6. I’m Yours by Jason Miraz

And it’s our God-forsaken right to be loved loved loved loved loved

 

7. Pocket Full of Gold by American Authors

Very peppy.

 

8. Connection by OneRepublic

More pep.

 

9. Desolation Row by My Chemical Romance

I just like it.

 

10. Sinners by Barns Courtney

I couldn’t help but pick some negative songs. They pick me up.

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Out of curiosity, what’s your favorite song?

The Amazing, The Wonderful, The Spam Box

If there’s one thing that’s never failed to make me laugh, it’s the grammar-error ridden spam box. Behold its wonders.

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On Awesome Blogger Award

Really no matter if someone doesn’t understand afterward its up to other people that
they will assist, so here it happens.

Yup. I know exactly what you mean.

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On My Name in TBR Books Tag

As you! want something extremely new? Open and look at this page. Only there the choice of slaves for every desire and completely free! They are good slaves, they will and want perform anything you order !

Dude. How many times do I have to tell you? I have no interest in slaves. However, if you have chocolate, I would take that instead.

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On Awesome Blogger Award

First of all I want to say awesome blog! I had a quick question in which I’d
like to ask if you don’t mind. I was interested to know how you
center yourself and clear your mind before writing. I’ve had a hard time clearing my mind in getting my thoughts out.
I do take pleasure in writing but it just seems like the first 10 to
15 minutes are wasted just trying to figure out how to begin.
Any recommendations or tips? Many thanks!

Thanks :).

I don’t usually clear my mind before I start writing. It’s the writing itself that clears my mind. And if I can’t figure out how to begin, I’ll start in the middle.

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On 10 Things You Need to Know About Feminism

Great blog here! Also your web site loads up very fast!
What host are you using? Can I get your affiliate link
to your host? I wish my website loaded up
as quickly as yours lol

Thanks. I didn’t know it loaded up fast. My computer’s on its last dregs of life and it takes about five minutes to load up. So.

I’m using WordPress, as most of my readers are. I have no idea what the affiliate link is. (I’m also only vaguely aware of what it even is.)

LOL. It’s so funny that your website doesn’t load up as quickly as mine. LOLOLOLOL. That’s so funny. It’s the best joke I’ve ever heard. My socks have exploded from laughter.

You, my dear friend, are funny.

LOL.

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On Texting? What’s that?

This is a topic that is close to my heart… Cheers!

Where are your contact details though?

My address is 1234 Unicorn Way, Marshmallow Zone, Unicornia. I’ll appreciate all the fan mail and chocolate you send me because that’s surely the reason you want my contact details.

 

 

The Traitor’s Game || Book Review

The Traitor’s Game by Jennifer A. Nielsen || 3/5

Nothing is as it seems in the kingdom of Antora. Kestra Dallisor has spent three years in exile in the Lava Fields, but that won’t stop her from being drawn back into her father’s palace politics. He’s the right hand man of the cruel king, Lord Endrick, which makes Kestra a valuable bargaining chip. A group of rebels knows this all too well – and they snatch Kestra from her carriage as she reluctantly travels home.The kidnappers want her to retrieve the lost Olden Blade, the only object that can destroy the immortal king, but Kestra is not the obedient captive they expected. Simon, one of her kidnappers, will have his hands full as Kestra tries to foil their plot, by force, cunning, or any means necessary. As motives shift and secrets emerge, both will have to decide what – and who – it is they’re fighting for.

»»§««

• Lots of exposition dumping at the beginning that distracts from the story.
• The romance is VERY forced.
• It says that Kestra has been training, is violent, and dangerous, but she never really does anything to prove these claims.
• A Super Random Observation: There’s a character named Basil. In The False Prince, there’s a character named Sage. Is there a character named Sage. Is there a herb theme going on here?
• The fight scenes aren’t done well. To support Kestra’s supposed combative prowess, it seems as though all her opponents are unskilled, despite being trained and experienced soldiers.
• Kestra’s says that she cares a great deal about her servants, but there are almost no interactions between them. Their relationship isn’t fleshed out and Kestra’s situation, therefore, doesn’t seem as dire as it supposedly is.
• Kestra and Simon’s relationship is forced and unrealistic. Despite thinking about each other all the time and being attracted to each other, they constantly fight when they’re together. They are risking far too much for each other than is practical or advisable. They are planning a hypothetical future for themselves (if only their love wasn’t forbidden. *Dramatic sigh*) after only having been reunited for three days. It’s honestly kind of ludicrous that they’d “fall in love” after days. Especially since they originally hated each other.
• Overdramatic and not suspenseful.
• I enjoyed the ending, though the twists were not particularly surprising.
• The antagonist was undeveloped and we only saw them once. The antagonist was portrayed more as a looming evil force.

This book was rather disappointing, especially considering how much I adored The False Prince. I most likely will not read the sequel to this book, but I will try other books by Nielsen. Overall, this book was rather forgettable. Nothing stuck out. The worst part was the romance. I don’t mind a well-done romance that is integral to the plot, but this one didn’t add anything to the story and was highly impractical. And I know love is supposedly not about practicality but *shudders* feelings. But this was such a non-romance that I was gagging at not rooting for that the impracticality took the spotlight.

Read 8/15/2018 – 8/21/2018

Currently Reading Vengeful by V.E. Schwab.

The Nightingale || Book Review

The Nightingale by Kristin Hannah || 5/5

In love we find out who we want to be. In war we find out who we are.

FRANCE, 1939

In the quiet village of Carriveau, Vianne Mauriac says goodbye to her husband, Antoine, as he heads for the Front. She doesn’t believe that the Nazis will invade France…but invade they do, in droves of marching soldiers, in caravans of trucks and tanks, in planes that fill the skies and drop bombs upon the innocent. When France is overrun, Vianne is forced to take an enemy into her house, and suddenly her every move is watched; her life and her child’s life is at constant risk. Without food or money or hope, as danger escalates around her, she must make one terrible choice after another.

Vianne’s sister, Isabelle, is a rebellious eighteen-year-old girl, searching for purpose with all the reckless passion of youth. While thousands of Parisians march into the unknown terrors of war, she meets the compelling and mysterious Gäetan, a partisan who believes the French can fight the Nazis from within France, and she falls in love as only the young can…completely. When he betrays her, Isabelle races headlong into danger and joins the Resistance, never looking back or giving a thought to the real–and deadly–consequences.

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• The writing is beautiful.
• The descriptions are lovely and it makes it easy to paint a picture of the setting in your mind.
• The characters are amazing. They are strong people that I am attached to and you can’t help but root for them.
• The book made me feel emotions!
• The best part about this book is the characters. They’re well-developed and they have good character arcs.
• The plot is strong.
• It was slow at times.

Ahhh! That review was so short. There isn’t much to say, despite the book being so long. However, I must say that this book is AMAZING. It’s my favorite historical fiction and you won’t regret picking it up.

Read 8/9/2018 – 8/14/2018

Furyborn || Book Review

Furyborn by Claire Legrand || 3.5/5

Follows two fiercely independent young women, centuries apart, who hold the power to save their world…or doom it.

When assassins ambush her best friend, the crown prince, Rielle Dardenne risks everything to save him, exposing her ability to perform all seven kinds of elemental magic. The only people who should possess this extraordinary power are a pair of prophesied queens: a queen of light and salvation and a queen of blood and destruction. To prove she is the Sun Queen, Rielle must endure seven trials to test her magic. If she fails, she will be executed…unless the trials kill her first.

A thousand years later, the legend of Queen Rielle is a mere fairy tale to bounty hunter Eliana Ferracora. When the Undying Empire conquered her kingdom, she embraced violence to keep her family alive. Now, she believes herself untouchable–until her mother vanishes without a trace, along with countless other women in their city. To find her, Eliana joins a rebel captain on a dangerous mission and discovers that the evil at the heart of the empire is more terrible than she ever imagined.

As Rielle and Eliana fight in a cosmic war that spans millennia, their stories intersect, and the shocking connections between them ultimately determine the fate of their world–and of each other.

»›§‹«

• Overall, this was a moderately entertaining book. However, I was bored.
• The completely different storylines were interesting, almost like two books in one, but the alternating chapters made it choppy.
• I was also far more interested in Eliana’s story, and I found myself slogging through Rielle’s chapters to get to them.
• It’s curious trying to figure out who the Sun Queen and Blood Queen are. It’s interesting figuring out which characters are good people and who to root for.
• The characters aren’t developed. I didn’t really care about them.
• I feel like this book is really similar to Children of Blood and Bone by the overall feeling of the book and what I thought of it. Too much action and not enough development.
• The storyline is eerily similar to that of Throne of Glass.
• Confusing at times.
• Nice concept, poor execution.

Read 8/2/2018 – 8/9/2018

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Currently Reading: Keeper of the Lost Cities: Everblaze by Shannon Messenger

Recently Finished: Vicious by V.E. Schwab

To Kill a Kingdom || Book Review

To Kill a Kingdom by Alexandra Christo || 5/5

Princess Lira is siren royalty and the most lethal of them all. With the hearts of seventeen princes in her collection, she is revered across the sea. Until a twist of fate forces her to kill one of her own. To punish her daughter, the Sea Queen transforms Lira into the one thing they loathe most—a human. Robbed of her song, Lira has until the winter solstice to deliver Prince Elian’s heart to the Sea Queen or remain a human forever.

The ocean is the only place Prince Elian calls home, even though he is heir to the most powerful kingdom in the world. Hunting sirens is more than an unsavory hobby—it’s his calling. When he rescues a drowning woman in the ocean, she’s more than what she appears. She promises to help him find the key to destroying all of sirenkind for good—But can he trust her? And just how many deals will Elian have to barter to eliminate mankind’s greatest enemy?

»»ℵ««

• There are some flaws with this book, but I’m rating it 5/5 for pure enjoyability.
• The main characters are developed, but the minor ones are not. And whatever personality they do have, it’s basically a reflection of the main characters’.
• There wasn’t a ton of romance! Which was lovely. It’s so much better when YA books aren’t needlessly bogged down by romances. However, for the romance that there was, I didn’t feel the chemistry.
• Fast-paced. I was never bored and kept turning pages, despite the fact that I had other things to do.
• There are pirates! Have I ever missed an opportunity to tell you dudes how much I love pirates? I haven’t found a pirate book that I dislike yet.
• Loved the morally grey characters.
• Interesting and unique world.
• It was funny. I laughed out loud quite a bit. Lovely banter.
• The writing was pretty. There was nice imagery.

Read 7/30/18 – 8/2/2018

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Currently Reading: Vicious by V.E. Schwab

• So far this book is AMAZING. I really should be getting other stuff done, though…

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Recent DNFs

Days of Blood & Starlight by Laini Taylor

• I read the first book, Daughter of Smoke & Bone, but I didn’t particularly like it. I was bored throughout it. So I gave the second book a chance, but it didn’t manage to wow me.
• However, the writing is beautiful.

 

Ace of Shades by Amanda Foody

• I only read a couple chapters of this book, but I didn’t like the writing style and everything felt forced.

The Most Hilarious Spam Comments Ever

One of my favorite parts of blogging is getting spam comments. The spam box is a magical place, but be careful that you don’t get lost.

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I’m Back (What’s Your Name?)

I’m Back (What’s your name?)

(haha corny jokes)

Well, I’m sort of back. Arachnid might’ve told you about how I can’t go into my WordPress account anymore because the password tap danced out of the confines of my otherwise junkyard of a brain. I’m sorry for not being on the blog for so long and not being as dedicated, but from now on I’ll try my best to post every week.

So the situation is (for now anyway) that I will write the blog on google docs first then I’ll give it to Arachnid to post under my name. It’s kind of like sockpuppet situation where the hand goes into the sock, but the sock does all the talking, if you know what I’m getting at.

Since I left, a lot of things have happened to me. I’ve been tossed into a new setting, trying to fend for myself in the vigorous cycle of high school. I’d say looking for the best human cluster to follow to my next class is the hardest thing to get the hang of. Making friends is difficult because all of my peers say I’m way too particular about how the class smells. (But I need to voice my opinions, right?)

Right now, my octopus Anipharas is sleeping and looks like a brown undersea spectacle of the senses. He brings a calm sea to my soul as well as make me swoon. I wish I could take a picture (my octopus is quite photogenic) but that would wake him up. His ears are very sensitive.

That wraps things up, I guess. I hope I can make more frequent blog posts in the future.

Bye ❤