Greetings, dear nonexistent readers! We are here today to celebrate
fifty a hundred followers (who don’t exist, as they are nonexistent). That’s… fifty a hundred more followers than we expected, so…good job pressing that follow button.
In our post, 50 Followers!, we asked you guys to ask some questions, which we will answer in this Mega Q&A Special. After that, so we have fifty questions and match the theme of this thing, we had our lovely friend Ned the Narwhal from Unicorn Sightings ask some more…creative questions.
Note: So guys, this was supposed to be the fifty follower Q&A special, but due to our procrastination, we somehow managed to acquire 100 followers somewhere between getting fifty followers and writing this post. So wow, guys. Thanks.
To match the theme of “a hundred” instead of fifty, both Spinette and I will be answering each of the questions instead of every other question. Therefore, there will be a hundred answers.
Another Note: While we were conducting the interrogation, we realized that fifty questions are more than we thought and it was lunchtime and we were hungry so there are 27 questions. Apologies.
Questions 1-10 are from the nonexistent readers and 11-27 are from our lovely friend Ned the Narwhal.
- From mainepaperpusher, we have: Why the spidery monikers?
- A: First, I’ve got to commend you on your vocabulary. (Monikers-a person’s name, especially a nickname or alias. [definition courtesy of dictionary.com]). We discussed this topic thoroughly in Why we are The WebWeavers, but the summary is that “We spin webs of lies to trap our readers” and “What is a storyteller but a glorified liar?”. Basically, our parents named us after spidery things and we worked with it.
- S: ‘Coz we are cool, bruh.
- From Plant Electrician, we have: Now that you have 50 followers how else are you going to celebrate other than answering comment questions?
- A: We are going to consume hypothetical muffins.
- S: I’m going to jump on my bed listening to screamo music concerning milk
- From authorsinspirations, we have: What’s your real name?
- A: I am Arachnid Weaver, and she is Spinette Spyder.
- S: SPINETTE SUPER SPYDER—I am a distant relative of Superman.
- From Plot Monster, we have: What is your favorite genre to read?
- A: Fantasy. I have nothing against other genres, but recently I’ve found myself reading more fantasy than anything else. But it’s a really diverse genre and most two books aren’t alike. AND SIX OF CROWS.
- S: Books that are well-executed. Any book that is good, is good.
- From Mr and Mrs NW, we have: Why do you guys call us ‘nonexistent’? It’s really rude to say we don’t exist.
- A: This “nonexistent readers” thing was spawned from the creation of our book, Slugventures: The Adventures of a Slug. When we were writing most of it, we had no idea that we were going to publish or do anything with it, really. We were just writing it to make each other laugh, and since no one other than Spinette and I were reading it, our readers were “nonexistent”. In Slugventures, we do refer to the readers as “nonexistent readers” and it just sort of carried over to the blog once we started it.
- S: This is because you guys are, in fact, nonexistent. You are all figments of our imagination.
- From Mr and Mrs NW, we have: Are you [Arachnid] and Spinette this witty in real life or do you save all of the hilariousness for the blog?
- A: Definitely. Except witty comments are often rude, and as I was told as a young child to “not say anything if it’s not nice,” my witty comments remain locked in my head.
- S: Yes. My charisma gets me high-up jobs. Hypothetically.
- From Sophia Ismaa Writes: Where did ‘Arachnid Weaver’ originate from?
- A: *Shrugs* Ask my parents.
- S: Epson printer.
- From Sophia Ismaa Writes: Other than blogging what are your passions and goals in life?
- A: I have to keep my closet clean.
- S: To have a world record of chopping the most footlemons.
- From theherdlesswitch: What’s your favorite song?
- A: Gold by Imagine Dragons or Unstoppable by The Score
- S: There Is A Cat Licking Your Birthday Cake by Parry Gripp and I Was Meant To Be Yours from the Heathers Musical.
- What is your favorite word?
- A: “Grotesque”, “lovely”, and “yeasty”. I also like “puffy”.
- S: “Spinette” is my favorite word.
- What is the last color of the rainbow?
- A: Violet all the way.
- S: Indigo! It is indigo! Indigo!
- Where do all your hypothetical people go on vacation?
- A: My hypothetical people go to the very real Unicornia on vacation.
- S: My peeps go to the place of chocolate relaxation known as Coco Puffs.
- Gel pens or ballpoint?
- A: Gel pens all the way. I refuse to write with ballpoint unless I am in dire circumstances.
- S: Ballpoint. It’s way cleaner than gel pens. Although pencils are my jam.
- Are you for or against immortality?
- A: Against.
- S: Against. I like people in small doses.
- How many uses for paperclips can you think of?
- A: A lot.
- S: Earrings.
- Tell us a deep, dark secret that nobody knows.
- A: Nobody doesn’t know any of my secrets.
- S: I kissed my first-grade teacher.
- Do you believe in leprechauns?
- A: Yes.
- S: No. Again, everyone is a figment of my imagination.
- Do you occasionally lie?
- A: Yes.
- S: No. I am a moral being.
- Are you lying right now?
- A: …
- S: I love you!
- What is your favorite kind of sandwich?
- A: Lettuce.
- S: Bread sandwich all the way, brush.
- Are you afraid of the dark?
- A: No. But I could be afraid of what’s in the dark. I suppose it depends on where I am and what threats are in the area.
- S: I love the darkness and hate the light. I’m like Batman.
- What kind of bird would you want to see in real life?
- A: I’m debating between a phoenix and a kiwi bird.
- S: I would like to see an Angry Berd one day.
- What is the purpose of this blog?
- A: To fill previously blank space with words.
- S: TO BE COOL, BRUSH! (and promote our book. Go buy it on Amazon, yeah!)
- Do you have a strong attachment to any vegetables in particular?
- A: Kelly the Zucchini was extremely nice before I ate her.
- S: Cereal is my jam. Go eat some.
- What do you think of controversial topics?
- A: Thoughts
- S: Racism is bad, Isis is a terrorist group. and vases should not be broken.
- Do you collect anything?
- A: Stuffed animals. Beanie Boos in particular (they are adorable). And also cat shirts. I used to collect glitter, the circles from hole punchers, used-up lead, and four-leaf clovers.
- S: Life.
- What is your favorite flavor?
- A: Red.
- S: Taste the rainbow, cry the rainbow.