If you haven’t read Weird Things I used to Think (which you probably haven’t, as you don’t exist), you should definitely read it.
Well, anyway, I forgot to add one weird thing that I used to think, as I was a small person quite a bit of time ago and it’s only normal that some obscure details get lost in the back of my mind, buried under piles of other memories and such.
Eating Seeds Will Make You Turn Into a Tree
This one I know a lot of other children believed as well. I think it’s something parents tell their children to try and prevent death by choking. I think that’s a horrifying thing to tell your children. While it wasn’t my parents that told me this, I was extremely frightened of this happening.
When my fear of this reached a peak, to the point where I stayed away from cherries and the like, my father told me that it is false, but around the same time, my cousins showed me a fake website about a man who ate a seed and literally turned into a tree.
So who am I supposed to believe, my father, or a random video on the internet?
Obviously, I chose the internet.
One must always believe whatever one finds on the internet.
So this scarred me and I believed that I could possibly turn into a tree at any unknown moment whilst consuming fruit (because fruit has seeds, while vegetables don’t).
I believed this until fourth-grade when our science teacher told us that plants need sunlight, and air, and water.
Well, I didn’t know about air or water, but I knew for a fact that there was no sunlight in my stomach.
I was really angry at my cousins.